Thursday, June 12, 2008

在劫難逃 II: 倒霉至極- Visa denied

I kept on trying to finish the part two of my 在劫難逃 posting. However, it kept on getting stalled and I just could not finish it…

Today, I limped along with my cane to the American Institute in Taipei to get my visa to go back to New York to finish my unfinished business.

After a long wait, finally it was my turn for the interview… and the terminal ruling was--- visa denied.

The reason? Something like there is no proof that I am bounded to a degree program or something like that.

I said to the immigration officer, “But I could have finished the degree last year except for the fact that I was on sick leave the whole year and I even have the doctor’s note to prove it.”

Useless attempt.

“Is there anyone else I could speak with?” I politely inquired further.

“Nope.”

So I walked away from the window with a piece of paper different from that received by the others—abnormal, extra-ordinary? lol

Walking out of the American Institute, bewildered by my not really feeling all that bad, the security guard greeted me, asking me which way I was heading to….

“Go home.” I responded.

On my way home, I saw people and people saw me… and, naturally, to me, they knew that my visa application just got denied and everyone have that empathic look to me.

Call me in shock or I had already seen it coming… It doesn’t really matter.

I, interestingly, felt calm and a sense of relief… sort of like what the words of Bismarck cited in Frankl’s writing, “Life is like being at the dentist. You always think that the worst is still to come, and yet it is over already.”

For me, the worst is not the denied of green card or visa (although the denial of the first might have something to do with the denial of the later.)

The worst was the process of living up to today… through the pains, agony, anger, frustration, loss, sense of injustice and uncertainty, which could be readily found in my Ratology blog.

Facing a new era of my life…

I thought back to the point when I was coming back to Taipei this time… wanting to see whether I had finished as much of my unfinished business as possible.

Bill payment? Relationships? Work duty? Did I leave out anything else?

The only major problem I have is… how am I going to move things out of my room in New York city now that I can’t even get back to the United States?

The real emotional response I have is (and I know the gentleman was just doing his job)… “I have lost the health of my spine for the benefit of your American Education. Even though this is something 在劫難逃 and this is absolutely GOD DAMN FXCKING FUCKED-UP that you denied my stupid visa. Fucked up… Fucked up….” (Oops… 8-O Zen moment… lol sigh)

PS. Ratprincess is still looking for an American Husband so that she could convert him into Taiwanese. Please contact me if you are interested… lol

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