The accident that turned me wholly disabled, both body and head run only in two speed... "slow and stop"... not to mention, when capable of reading academic papers, I have to live with things such as the deceased author would come to tutor me?
The thing about being wholly invisibly disabled is that... nobody could tell there is anything wrong with you unless you tell them and nobody could tell you exactly which part is causing what wrong.
For these past two years, the recovery of my body sort of plateau while my head kept on getting "better"... as indicated by the amount of meds required in my own book...
"Could it really be the whole thing about body and mind? The interconnectedness between psycho and soma? Could it be the chi clearing up at the top, which makes the soma having problems finishing processing?"
Some questions I dare not entertain but can not help wanting to entertain...
I told my shrink and he didn't seem to quite feel like entertaining this idea... and... for the body, talk to the body doctor...
I went to my body doctor and the reaction must have been something like... it's the shrink's question....
Everybody knows there is something wrong but nobody could figure out how to fix them wrongs. 8-O lol
Even if it is all psychosomatization or somapsychotization.... experts don't seem to quite know either...
After a few rounds of running between different doctors, and, after I started getting dizzy circling around like a diggie chasing its own tail...
All loopy and dizzy... I thought... poor doggie... you could chase your own tail to your heart's content...
How does it help? 8-O lol sigh
You do still ponder, though.
But, you learn to tune it down and make it play in the background... lower and lower...
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